passive aggressive behaviour and emotional abuse – 3 things to know

passive aggressive behaviour and emotional abuse – 3 things to know

Being in a PA relationship will feel SO emotionally abusive at times that you may consider leaving your partner. Below are three specific behaviours used as PA responses which affect the way you view yourself and your sense of reality.  These destructive behaviours eat away at who you are and what you know to be true.  You can end up in a haze of disbelief, mistrust and confusion.  Your head is a tangle of mixed up emotions and it is hard to think straight. Blame Passive aggressive people have deep rooted insecurity which affects their ability to take responsibility for their actions.   We all…

Read more

Passive, Aggressive or Passive-Aggressive – what’s the difference?

Passive, Aggressive or Passive-Aggressive – what’s the difference?

  How does passive aggressive behaviour differ from simple passive or plain aggressive behaviour.  What’s worse, better or are they all as bad as each other. Passive Behaviour Suzie has been married to Gavin for 4 years.  Gavin works in the City, is quite dominating, controlling and enjoys going out for a drink (or two) with his work colleagues at the end of the week.  She is a qualified teacher but for now on maternity leave, with 2 small children.  Feeling under pressure from Gavin to keep the house clean and tidy is hard on her.  Therefore at weekends she likes to make plans to…

Read more

How do you know when a relationship has past its sell-by date?

How do you know when a relationship has past its sell-by date?

Take the shopping:  When the price is right, the food might still go in the trolley on and beyond the sell-buy date.   Use-by dates are also not necessarily adhered to.   The food may be a bit manky round the edges but the taste isn’t too bad, certainly not enough to throw away.  It is only when there is more concern of greater harm than good do we throw away. So how can we use the same guide for our relationships. In the beginning it all looks good, feels good and tastes good.  The attraction is there, nice packaging,…

Read more

Why successful people have therapy

Why successful people have therapy

With the sad news today of the death of the wonderful actor James Gandolfini it got me to thinking about how many times my own clients have told me they have felt like Tony Soprano in the therapy room.  Tony was the mafia boss so wonderfully portrayed by James in the six series of the Sopranos.  Tony and his therapist had that kind of relationship that is essential to good therapy.  He would tell her all the gory details of his rise to power and his everyday problems of being a mafia boss and she would help him explore his thoughts…

Read more

What is passive aggressive Behaviour?

What is passive aggressive Behaviour?

Put simply passive aggressive behaviour can be described as a silent form of aggression. It is where you are angry with someone but do not or cannot tell them. It may involve, shutting off verbally, it may involve angry looks, obvious changes in behaviour, being obstructive, sulky or stonewalling. It is characterized by an indirect resistance to the demands of others and an avoidance of direct confrontation, as in procrastinating, evading, pouting, or deliberately creating confusion. A passive aggressive individual doesn’t always exhibit outward anger or appear malicious. At first glance, the behaviour might appears unassuming, gracious and benevolent; underneath…

Read more