5 reasons people stay in passive aggressive relationships

5 reasons people stay in passive aggressive relationships

  Being in a passive aggressive relationship is not easy to live with or talk about. No matter what your partner does, staying with them also says something about you.  So why do you stay?  Why do you swing between love and hate? You live in hope that they will change When things are bad between you it feels like the worst thing ever.  You can’t think straight or see straight.   However hard you try to find out what the problem is, you are met with a brick wall.  One way to cope is to tell yourself this will not go on for…

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Forgiveness: How do you forgive someone that has hurt you?

Forgiveness: How do you forgive someone that has hurt you?

How do I forgive?  How do I let go?  These questions are often asked to me in the therapy room.   When someone you love hurts you in some way it is very hard to come to terms with.  It is easier to let go when that person is not so close, such as a work colleague or an acquaintance.   We can take the view that we don’t really need them in our life or even like them that much.  Its easier to see them as a negative person or difficult to get along with.  For example a work place…

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5 reasons not to argue by text

5 reasons not to argue by text

How many times do you have arguments by text.  I was talking to a colleague the other day who refuses to engage in this kind of conflict.  As she so rightly pointed out, once something is in writing there’s no taking it back. In arguments we might say things we would not normally say, hurtful things or attacking comments.  We sometimes blame others when things go wrong before we have had a chance to think things through.  Then the arguments start, you said, he said and she said.  Feelings can explode in an unhelpful way. Now I’m not saying it isn’t…

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How do you know when a relationship has past its sell-by date?

How do you know when a relationship has past its sell-by date?

Take the shopping:  When the price is right, the food might still go in the trolley on and beyond the sell-buy date.   Use-by dates are also not necessarily adhered to.   The food may be a bit manky round the edges but the taste isn’t too bad, certainly not enough to throw away.  It is only when there is more concern of greater harm than good do we throw away. So how can we use the same guide for our relationships. In the beginning it all looks good, feels good and tastes good.  The attraction is there, nice packaging,…

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Love hurts

Love hurts

When love hurts there is no pain like it.  We all feel hurt from time to time, choked up , tearful and sometimes confused.  People let us down, surprise us with their actions and or inactions and disappoint. When this happens to us it is a warning that something is not right, our relationship, work situation or friendship.  Honest communication with the other person is always a good step.  Try and find out what happened, is there something you are not aware of.  Try to get to the bottom of it so you can understand. If other people’s behaviour towards…

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